IPA friday: the birds and the bees

hops: a pretty little green flower that grows on a vine and kinda look a bit like a pinecone. hops are considered the spice in a beer. if emeril were a brewer these would be his "bam!"

there are literally hundreds of varieties of hops. from citrusy to grassy to piney to floral-y to herbal-y. and every beer (especially IPAs) will taste different depending on the hops used.

hops are also responsible for the bitternes of a beer. now bitterness may not sound great at first but IPAs are a palette-changer. the second you start to love a hoppy beer the more you want to try.

malts: the hearty part of the beer. malts are grains that are malted (wah-lah). typical grains used are barley, wheat, rye, and oats. malting is a process of kilning and sprouting. the kilning process caramelizes the grain (han solo is familiar with this process). the color of the malt ranges from light to dark which determines the flavor. the darker the malt the more intense the flavor.

yeast: this is where the biology-loving side of my brain has a mini beer-brewing orgasm. this single-celled micro-organism makes the alcohol and carbon dioxide in beer.  beer yeast gives beer a different kind of flavor.

2 of a kind: ale yeast (the kind put in ales) is top fermenting so it rises to the surface of beer during fermentation. lager yeast (the kind in lagers...whoa) is bottom fermenting. they like it slow and cold. n ale will be served much warmer than a lager to keep the flavor/alcohol/co2 (carbon dioxide) in check.

shoes, let's get some shoes!

it's well known by the people around me that i'm kinda obsessed with wearing the highest shoes i can find. charlotte calls them my hooker shoes. i'll take it.

jeffrey campbells are my guilty pleasure. i've tried them on so many times and then when i realize i should probably be spending 300 bucks on bills, i walk away, broken-hearted.

the one's i keep trying on as though one day someone will say, "hey! guess what? FREE!"

use "lovelittle" at motelrocks.com to get 20% off. whoop whoop!

1, 2, 3, 4, 5

adultish things

about a month ago i went out with courtney jenae in la (i made a rhyme, it ain't a crime). we went to a club. i hate clubs. it was quite the interesting night to say the least. i was hit on by every guy that was with us, including her boyfriend. umm, major awks!

well that night rondog called over and over and over again. i knew he had been drinking and from experience, he was in his "grass is always greener" mode. basically, when he has a girlfriend for a long period of time his eyes start to wander. and at 3am they wander my way. it's been this way since i was 15 years old.

i remember one time, when i was in high school, i brought up the infamous "3am phone call" to him. he knew i liked him and it just teased me. so he explained that i was never the girl to "date" i was the girl he would marry.

and then there was the time when i would ditch school and stay at his house because i hated it so much and he carved "#1 girl" above his bed.

and then there was the time my mom read my diary and found out i was ditching and staying at ronnie's so she made my dad call him and tell him not to talk to me. and my mom told me that he wouldn't be my friend a month from then. 9 years later i made that decision for myself.

and then the time he left to ucsb and he came over the night before and we both cried and picked  "our song" (save tonight by eagle eye cherry).

and then the time we went to lunch and i realized that the grass really was greener for me and i ended it for good with my asshole ex.

9 1/2 years of friendship ended that night at that club in la. i called him back and told him that he had a good thing (his current girlfriend) and he needed to stop questioning himself and messing with my feelings. i told him we either become friends again or we go separate ways. he chose the latter. and i actually understood. i didn't try to fight it. i think my brain and my heart had been preparing me for the day that officially saying goodbye for good would come.

so that's it folks, the end of the rondog677 saga.

tunesday: imagine dragons

i'm a bit obsessed with acoustic versions of already awesome songs. this guy's unedited voice is so good.

o.n.s.

one night stands. we've all (or most of us) have had them. i've never had one one-night-stand that i have not regretted. the worst is when it starts as a one-nighter and then ends with you thinking this could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.

unfortunately, life never really turns out that way. and as a somewhat/sometimes emotional woman that hurts more than a 6 month relationship that doesn't work out. i definitely need to start learning from experience. if the first one didn't turn into a budding romance straight out of a nicholas sparks novel, what makes me think that the next one will? silly girl.

secret sunday

1. i'm really getting sick of this long distance thing. nothing has changed.

2. i think charlotte has a victoria's secret addiction.
3. my mom still thinks she can nag me from a completely different county.
4. i felt happier at the jobs i quit than the ones i quit them for.
5. i am uninspired today so this is my last secret.

blah.

i feel funny

dedicated to miles who get's his tooth fixed next week and needs to be sedated for it because he is such a man (muah).

IPA friday

a friend told me i should incorporate my beer love into this blog and teach people a little something about what makes beer fantastic. and since i do what people tell me i think i will.

this isn't going to be about bud light and newcastle but the craft beers. the beers that are a little piece of art and have led me to some pretty unforgettable nights. clearly, all the beer's fault.

so starting next friday i'll be bringing my semi-alcoholism to this blog.

let's be real

waiting is not easy. especially when the person i'm waiting for is in a completely different country, timezone, etc. it doesn't help when for the past week the amount of talking we've done probably wouldn't even add up to a 30 minute phone call. i've brought it up quite a bit hoping that things would start changing, but they're not.

i get the time difference but there are at least 8 hours in the day when we are both awake and can text. and it's all i'm really asking for. i don't need to skype all the time. it's just having and feeling like he is "there." i give a lot. something needs to be given back.

my theory is if he can't make time for me when he's all the way over there, how will he be able to make time to come all the way over here?

sarah seven

how amaze are those dresses? i've always had this fascination with weddings. i used to help my dad dj for weddings at an estate when i was in middle school.

my dream is to have a completely non-traditional/whimsical wedding. i know i either want to elope at city hall or vegas and party after or have my uncle marry me. lots of kitschyness and handmade goodness.

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tunesday

my brain is a bit of mushiness right now so i'm going to post a song. i'm not the biggest rihanna fan, skylar grey (and especially this version) makes me kinda love the song. plus, it is quite relatable for me at the mo'. enjoy.

#sorryimnotsorry

i'm a killer. a cold blooded serial killer. weapon of choice: that vacuum. innocent victim: fruit flies. my new house is literally infested. it's kind of like um disgusting. i have a theory as to why they are all over, but i will not disclose on here. regardless, it's disgusting and it seems like i'm the only one that really cares. so last night and tonight i sucked up at least 15 million flies (maybe probably an exaggeration).

if you don't hear from me in a week it is best to assume that they became zombie flies and ate me.

anyone know of any permanent ways to keep these jerks away? besides cleaning. cause i keep doing that.

secret sunday

1. working at one of my new jobs has been the best form of shopping addiction therapy for me.

2. i didn't go to sleep till 6am today. hashtag fml.
3. when i was in 1st grade my friend stole a dollar and asked me to hide it so i sat on it.
4. i got my 3rd grade love of my life's number the other day. we're just friends but i kinda felt fuzzy inside.
5. i'm the halloween scrooge this year. no costume. no plans.
6. MR and i almost...ALMOST hung out last night then i said no.
7. i got promoted at work. whoop whoop. but i don't want to take the position. wah-wah.

p.s. i wanna know those 2 more secrets!

one too many

charlotte and i went out saturday night. we didn't actually plan to get drunk. we did plan to go to disneyland after dinner and just one beer. didn't happen. we ended up drinking 3 beers and a couple martinis then meeting up with friends at another bar next door. the bartender at bj's is the same one from the post about charlotte's texting skills. he met up with us when he got off work. charlotte doesn't drink like that often, only with me really. so it got a little funny.

for some reason she apologized to the bartender. i'm not really sure why. nor is she. then at the party after the bar she practically fell asleep on him. he walked us out and it seemed fine but i have a feeling he probably isn't going out with us again. which means no more free pizookies. hmpf!

i don't think charlotte is really ready to be dating someone again though. i think she's still figuring things out. i kinda want her to join the online dating world. expand her possible suitor radius. 

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hey, you guys!

it just got real. like real real. miles has a few things he needs to handle in england before he flies over here which we have dubbed the 3 t's.

tooth - check! he chipped his tooth and because he such a (ahem) manly man (ahem) he needs to be sedated when they fix it so he had to get an appointment with a different dentist. appointment is wednesday!

taxes - i don't want to be harboring a fugitive so he has to pay his english taxes. speaking of taxes, he's never heard of the boston tea party! i mean if its on the internet it has to be true, right? we threw his high-taxed british tea into the ocean and he doesn't even know about it! preposterous.

there (or here depending on who is talking about it) - he still has to check with the embassy on whether or not his visa waiver is still valid and that he can stay at least 90 days with it. otherwise, he has to apply for another one and that is scary cause i don't want him to get denied.

secret sunday

1. i realized last night that the majority of my guy best friends are named ryan.

2. i have forgotten some of the people that i've slept with. oops.

3. i secretly love that the chicks that made me miserable in high school are now fat and have kids with multiple baby daddies. and i'm over here kid-free. karma beeotch.

4. speaking of fat, i ate a lot last night. like full-on 3 course meal.

5. mr. music finally gave me my ring back.

6. mr. music also came out last night and it was extremely awkward.
7. charlotte has a thing for bartenders.

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take a chill pill

my 2nd job is driving me a little bit insane. i may not be the most laid-back person in the world, but i definitely don't freak out over every single, tiny, little thing. every (well almost) person at this job acts like the littlest problem is a nuclear bomb explosion. they start yelling, pushing, eating people (well not literally, but wouldn't that be exciting).

it's kind of exciting to watch. reminds me of when a cartoon character has steam blowing out of their ears because they are so angry. or their eyes start bulging and veins start popping out of their face like the hulk. the fact that one of the managers sounds (and looks a little) like squidward doesn't really help his attempt at intimidating me either.

i think it's just something that "runs in the family." i do not want this to run in my blood and i'm really hoping it's not contagious. otherwise i will become chunky breakout city. and obviously that can't happen when miles is coming in 2 months. 

how do you deal with crazies at work?

i will wait

i'm sick right now. i really hate being sick. so for now, enjoy this video that pretty much defines the next 2 months for me. minus all the jesus reference.

ps sorry for the quality. it was the best version i could find where they were really into it.

puppies and texts

miranda and her roomie got a puppy! and by roomie i mean guy that is a jerk who happens to sleep in the same room as her and chances are the same bed. and by puppy, i mean something else that inevitably ties her to the jerk that brings her down.

we have been a little distant lately and i think this might play a big part in it. i'm honest with her and since she already knows i disapprove, i'm sure she knows how i feel about this new addition to her dysfunctional little family. sometimes we have to make mistakes to learn. i know that is the only thing that helped me when i lived with the crappy ex.

and in other news, charlotte sucks at flirty texts. and i am her texting tutor. i blame the jerks she has dated in the past and also the fact that me and her are on complete different levels in the dating world. which also probably has to do with my "hooker shoes" (what she calls my jeffrey campbell's). the bartender from our pizookie night sneakily put his number in her phone monday night. and naturally she is having me proofread every text before it is sent.

i want her to find someone that is just a little naughty. someone that can make her feel comfortable enough to break out of her shell just enough to have a little more fun.